Mogami v DadMan: The Wonder Years...

[mogami]

News from MPN Fair and Balanced.

[Admiral DadMan]

LMAO! That's priceless! Turn back on the way to you buddy.

[mogami]

Hi, From the "unseen archives" of WWII.

[mogami]

Hi, It's been awhile since i entertained Dman with a musical

The Wonder Years

Act One Scene One

CHORUS:
So this is Mogami , the famous PBEMer,
You're welcome, Mogami...

MOGAMI:
If that's the case, I'll go

CHORUS:
Oh, no, you mustn't go...

MOGAMI
Who said I mustn't go?
The only reason that I came is so that I can go.

I'm Mogami,
My gaming standing's very high,
Well, anyways, ladies and gentlemen, I
am Mogami

CHORUS
He's Mogami...

Mogami:
I'm Mogami,
As a matter of fact, to be exact,
I'm Mogami!

FEMALE SINGER
I'm sure that they'd all like to hear,
Some facts about your great career

Mogami
Although my horn I hate to blow,
There's one thing that you ought to know:

I'm Mogami
Which all my friends will verify
Well, anyways ladies and gentlemen, I
am Mogami

CHORUS:
He's Mogami

Mogami
I'm Mogami,
You never would guess, but nevertheless
I'm Mogami!

For Allied players who are not phenomial, my charges are nominal
Though I'm great I've got a full directory ,
Sick and healthy, poor and wealthy, come direct to me
"Oh, God bless you!" they yell
When I send them turns well,
But they never, no they never, send a check to me.

I've won undeserved acclaim for playing games both in the north and south,
You'll find my name just like my pilsner in everybody's mouth; (except mine)
I've never lost a case...

CHORUS:
He's never lost a case...

Mogami:
I've lost a lot of games, but I've never lost a case!

My planning never fails, I know just what to do,
Whenever anybody ails, I'm sympathetic too,
My heart within me melts...

CHORUS:
His heart within him melts...

Mogami:
No matter what I try for, they capture something else.

When your nerves start to clog, put your faith in the Mog,
When you're losing he will stick to the end,
With the possible exception of his mother,
Mogami is Dadman's best friend!

CHORUS:
Yes, Mogami is Dadmans best friend!

Mogami:
Mogami is Dadmans best friend, whoa-oh,
Mogami is Dadmans best friend,

Mogami & CHORUS:
Mogami is Dadmans best friend!

Mogami:
Right or wrong, wrong or right,
Night and day, day and night,
On his email you can always depend;
With the possible exception of his mother and his father
And his uncles and his brothers and his nephews and his nieces
And his sisters and his cousins, whom he numbers by the dozens...

Mogami & CHORUS:
Mogami is Dadmans best friend!

Scene Two
Dadman

Consider yourself at war
Consider yourself one of my opponents
I've taken to your House rules so strong
It's clear we're going to get along

Consider yourself well in
Consider yourself occupied
There isn't a lot thats fair
Who cares, I'm bombing Tokyo it's share

If it should chance to be we should see some harder days
Empty email box days, why grouse
Always a chance to do two turns the next
Then the blame is on my spouse

Consider yourself our opponent
We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration we can state
Consider yourself my PBEM mate!


Mogami

To scheme the impossible scheme,
to fight the unbeatable foe,
to bear with unbearable sorrow,
to run where the brave dare not go...

To win the unwinnable scenario,
to play pure and not exploit Japan,
to play when my brains are too weary
to plan the unbeatable plan!

This is my quest --
to follow that plan
no matter how hopeless,
no matter how far --
To fight for the right
without question or pause,
to be willing to march into hell
for a heavenly cause! (or at least a Pilsner Urquel)

And I know
if I'll only be true
to this vain glorious delusion
that my mind
will be totally gone
when Dman finally discovers fusion.

And the AAR will be better for this
that one man, scorned and running Japan,
still strove with his last ounce of courage
To plan the unbeatable plan!

[mogami]

Act II Scene I

Dadman (at his computer)

I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;
I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes!
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform,
And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus' uniform:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery--
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee.
For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
Now if I can only figure out this games interface
How to set up task forces and move to place
what setting for altitude and bombing range
what the dickens all is strange
I have not got a clue
To this game I am very new
Mogami is every where
He makes me pull out hair
I think I need a drink
At least three weeks to sit and think
I am the very model of a modern whipping boy
I can tell right now from this game I'll get no joy
My head hurts just from watching the combat replay
Just how many turns can he do a day?

[1275psi]

very good mog

But more on actually winning a game for japan hey!~

[Admiral DadMan]

And people wonder why I'm laughing so hard when I see stuff like this.

[Admiral DadMan]

Tomorrow night, I'm plannig to post a huge amount of turns, as this AAR is about 2 months behind the game. If successful, I plan to get us to about Dec 42.

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]19 OCT 42

Coastal Guns at Koepang, firing at IJN unloading troops over beach at Koepang

PT Gyoraitei #4, Shell hits 2
PC Ch 15, Shell hits 16
PG Takunan Maru #10, Shell hits 4

2184 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 24 Vehicles lost 4 [/font]

I sent a small TF (1 CA, 2 CL, 4 DD) to see what was what landing at Koepang. They ran into 4 PT, 7 MSW, 7 PG/PC, 27 AP and did some damage:

[font="Courier New"] PT Gyoraitei #4, Shell hits 4, and is sunk
MSW W.1, Shell hits 1, Torpedo hits 1, and is sunk
MSW W.2, Shell hits 5, and is sunk
PG Nikkai Maru, Shell hits 5, on fire, heavy damage
AP Taibun Maru, Shell hits 9, on fire

154 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 1

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-24D Liberator B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on TF at 29,77

PT Gyoraitei #5, Bomb hits 4, on fire, heavy damage
PG Uji, Bomb hits 1, on fire
PG Yachiyo Maru, Bomb hits 1, on fire
AP Kiyozumi Maru, Bomb hits 1, heavy damage
AP Koryu Maru, Bomb hits 2, on fire, heavy damage

77 Japanese casualties reported

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on TF at 31,75

CL Naka, Bomb hits 1

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Deliberate Ground attack at Koepang
Attacking force 20090 troops, 244 guns, 80 vehicles
Defending force 36052 troops, 185 guns, 13 vehicles

Allied assault odds: 0 to 1
116 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 4 Vehicles lost 1
1135 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 39 Vehicles lost 3[/font]

Bad idea.

[Capt. Harlock]

Allied Deliberate Ground attack at Koepang
Attacking force 20090 troops, 244 guns, 80 vehicles
Defending force 36052 troops, 185 guns, 13 vehicles

Allied assault odds: 0 to 1
116 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 4 Vehicles lost 1
1135 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 39 Vehicles lost 3

Bad idea.

Yup. This is what Bombardment attacks are for.

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]20 OCT 42

Allied Sub KXVIII attacks near Koepang
AP Kiyozumi Maru, Torpedo hits 2, on fire, heavy damage
86 Japanese casualties reported

KXVIII gets nailed by escorts in an ASW attack near Koepang, DC hits 1, on fire
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Coastal Guns at Koepang firing at IJN TF unloading troops over beach at Koepang,
PC Ch 15, Shell hits 2
AP Teiryu Maru, Shell hits 3, on fire
1673 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 4
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-25C Mitchell Day Air attack on TF at 28,78
AP Izan Maru, Bomb hits 2, on fire, heavy damage
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-24D Liberator Day Air attack on TF, near Koepang
MSW Toshi Maru #2, Bomb hits 1, on fire, heavy damage
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
G4M1 Betty Day Air attack on TF, near Ndini
AK Mercury, Torpedo hits 2, on fire, heavy damage
AK Mexican, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
115 Allied casualties reported
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on TF, near Koepang
CA Myoko, Bomb hits 1
CA Atago, Bomb hits 1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment attack at Koepang

Attacking force 17426 troops, 194 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 40887 troops, 229 guns, 11 vehicles

95 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 5[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]21 OCT 42

Coastal Guns at Koepang firing at IJN TF unloading troops over beach at Koepang
41 Japanese casualties reported[/font]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mogami the Merciless sends 6 CA 2 CL 6 DD to pound Koepang.

8” cruiser shells do bad things to things when they go “boom”:
[font="Courier New"]
BB Resolution, Shell hits 3, heavy damage
BB Revenge, Shell hits 6
BB Warspite, Shell hits 6
BB Valiant, Shell hits 5
CA Devonshire, Shell hits 3, heavy damage
CA Cornwall, Shell hits 1, on fire, heavy damage

Over 30 aircraft are destroyed.

361 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 6 Vehicles lost 1
Airbase hits 3 Airbase supply hits 1 Runway hits 26
Port hits 4 Port supply hits 9
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on TF, near Koepang
AP Kisogawa Maru, Bomb hits 1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment attack at Koepang

Attacking force 17232 troops, 192 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 41021 troops, 225 guns, 10 vehicles

171 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 3[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]22 OCT 42

Coastal Guns at Koepang firing at IJN TF unloading troops over beach at Koepang
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hudson Day Air attack on TF, near Koepang
AP Kaito Maru, Bomb hits 1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment attack at Koepang

Attacking force 17245 troops, 193 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 41180 troops, 227 guns, 10 vehicles

235 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 4[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]23 OCT 42

Allied Sub KIX attacks AP Taibun Maru 120nm NE of Koepang, 2 Torpedo hits , on fire, heavy damage
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment attack at Koepang

Attacking force 16808 troops, 195 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 41321 troops, 223 guns, 9 vehicles

73 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 5[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/24/42[/font]

Mogami the Merciless gives me another helping SMAKass at KoePANG with 5 CA, 6 CL, and 14 DD. Fortunately, I thought to get rid of my heavies before he laid the smakdown:

[font="Courier New"]Allied aircraft losses 25 destroyed
172 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 5
Airbase hits 7 Airbase supply hits 5 Runway hits 89 (and is closed for lunch)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-24D Liberator Day Air attack at Koepang
Japanese 65th Brigade 40 casualties reported Guns lost 2
Japanese 56th Division 70 casualties reported Guns lost 1
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
D3A Val G4M1 Betty Day Air attack on TF near Rennell Island
AK Potter, Bomb hits 2, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
AK Lihue, Torpedo hits 5, on fire, heavy damage
AK William Luckenbach, Torpedo hits 2, on fire, heavy damage[/font]

Stupid convoy routing waaaay too close to Lunga.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[font="Courier New"]Japanese Banzai charge at Koepang

Attacking force 41475 troops, 217 guns, 10 vehicles
Defending force 21605 troops, 195 guns, 75 vehicles
Japanese assault odds: 0 to 1 (fort level 6)

1907 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 46 Vehicles lost 5
100 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 3 Vehicles lost 1[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/25/42

B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Baker Island
78 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 3
Airbase hits 10 Airbase supply hits 5 Runway hits 16
Port hits 1 Port supply hits 4
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Base Force
Japanese 129th IJNAF 103 casualties reported Guns lost 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
G4M1 Betty Day Air attack on TF at 67,102
AK Potter, Torpedo hits 5, on fire, heavy damage
[font="Arial"]Not getting away from Lunga that fast...[/font]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment at Koepang

Attacking force 16632 troops, 188 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 38504 troops, 141 guns, 3 vehicles

11 Japanese casualties reported
13 Allied casualties reported Guns lost 1[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/26/42

B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Victoria
29 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 2
Airbase hits 2 Airbase supply hits 2 Runway hits 24
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Baker Island
49 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 2
Airbase hits 3 Airbase supply hits 5 Runway hits 24
141st IJA Base Force 62 Japanese casualties reported
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment at Koepang

Attacking force 16660 troops, 185 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 39002 troops, 145 guns, 3 vehicles

61 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 3[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/27/42

B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Victoria Point
Airbase hits 4 Runway hits 9
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack at Koepang
Japanese 56th Division 71 casualties reported Guns lost 2
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment at Koepang

Attacking force 20486 troops, 187 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 39180 troops, 141 guns, 4 vehicles

82 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 4[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/28/42

B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Victoria Point
24 Japanese casualties reported
Airbase hits 4 Airbase supply hits 1 Runway hits 17
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment at Koepang

Attacking force 24209 troops, 188 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 39594 troops, 136 guns, 4 vehicles

53 Japanese casualties reported[/font]

[Admiral DadMan]

[font="Courier New"]AFTER ACTION REPORTS FOR 10/29/42

Allied Sub Sunfish attacks TF 360nm SE of Honshu. 6 DD escorts pummel her with 3 hit, on fire
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
B-17E Fortress Day Air attack on Rangoon
Manpower hits 9
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Allied Ground Bombardment at Koepang

Attacking force 25770 troops, 191 guns, 0 vehicles
Defending force 39913 troops, 139 guns, 5 vehicles

16 Japanese casualties reported Guns lost 2[/font]