Hi!, sorry to say it but you have put yourself in a loose-losse situation....
No, I've put myself in a situation the designer/programmer hasn't accounted for yet. That's a little different.
Your aircraft is bingo... guys! In real life that's not a minor issue... you don't have gas to go back to your home base, in peacetime you will still have your alternate, but not in the game... so, now you want to cancel RTB to set a new heading to what purpose exactly?, you don't have fuel to go anywhere... So it's either trying to sneak through the enemy or to dicht in the water farther away from home....
I also can't change the altitude. That is a problem. I want to stay down on the deck and out of radar, but because of the 'autopilot' RTB I'm flying at 40,000 feet and enemy AEW vectored a fighter unseen to my location. The player should be able to at least override altitude on RTB because it is essential to survivability.
I can't check it right now, and I don't remember if the sim checks for alternate landing places when in Bingo status... in any case if you think that a more suitable airfield is available to avoid the enemy, just change the homebase of the aircraft... the new fuel calculations will start to reach the new homebase....
I have a airborne tanker that is closer than the alternate base. Is it possible to override the RTB calculation the AI is making and vector my aircraft to the tanker instead? I'm new to the game, so I'm not familiar with which ways you can (and which way(s) are best) handle aerial refueling.
These RTB conditions can be gamed as well. Because the AI will go to afterburner chasing bandits you can run away, cause them to burn up their fuel, and then lay an ambush on their RTB flight path. They'll be sitting ducks...