Without the beta patch, I couldn't play MP games at all (I could set up the game and play my first turn, but I couldn't load my opponent's turn because I got an endless red loading bar). I described the problem in length in the Slitherine Forum here: http://www.slitherine.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=30931
I get the impression that this forum is more lively, so I'm cross-posting my experiences with the patch here.
At first, when I installed the beta patch, I actually could load my opponent's turn for the first time in my life. Then we set up another scenario (Operation Overlord) and he (Grimnirsson) made his first turn as the Axis. Now it's my turn, but unfortunately, I cannot load my turn - I get the endless red loading bar again.
I tried several times, I always had to kill the game with the task manager. I also get a Windows error message that ToF.exe doesn't respond anymore. I appears - contrary to our first impression from the beta version - that the patch didn't solve my problem.
I didn't change anything (no hardware, no software, no current updates), I have ADSL 16.000+ and I can play other games (Battle Academy, TOAW III) just fine.
I hope there is a solution to my problem; we bought the game only because we wanted a strategic MP game and now this aspect of the game is useless for both of us.