From: Winnipeg, MB
ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
**************Aboard S-18, 820 nm W Coal Harbour************
Torpedoman First Class Buttafucco: <lying in bunk writing> ...."Dear Mom; I don't know when this will get to you but I had a few minutes so I wrote this. We was headed back to Frisco and then to San Diego but about 4 days out of Dutch Harbor, we was runnin' on the surface and the motor just quit. Boom! Just like that. Nothin'. Like she was out of gas but the tanks read 3/4. And she wouldn't restart either. The chief opened the starboard fuel bunker and he finds this note floatin' on the top. <pulls out copy to transcirbe correctly>
--In the interest of controlling global cooling, this fuel has been replaced with low volatility cocconut based ethanol, guaranteed to assay at least 85% pure. For information on our other products, please contact M&M Enterprises Altenate Fuels Divison, Dandjangas, Mindanao--
Well, mom, gotta go. My duty on the tow dinghy.
And during his long row, Joey B has time to dream about how to have a better life by social climbing on Long Island ...
Or maybe he made a legit fortune selling 85% pure coconut milk laced with torpedo alcohol and pineapple juice ...
No matter how bad a situation is, you can always make it worse. - Chris Hadfield : An Astronaut's Guide To Life On Earth