Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (Full Version)

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Titanwarrior89 -> Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 1:24:35 AM)

1. I am old....er.
2. I drink alot of coffee
3. I like to sit now, when doing number 2 above.
4. I would want free games[:)]
5. I may show up late now, well probley most of the time.[:(]
6. Open Cell phone use....
7. And sleep at my desk.....big desk
8. A desk bigger than Erik's
9. Believe everything on my resume.
10.Last but not least, never ever stress me out and must be home to watch the Big Bang Theory.[:o]




junk2drive -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 1:50:58 AM)

I sit now when doing number 1. Or do you mean number 2 on your list?




Titanwarrior89 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 2:08:57 AM)

I like to sit now drinking my coffee instead of rushing, just taking my time.[:)]
quote:

ORIGINAL: junk2drive

I sit now when doing number 1. Or do you mean number 2 on your list?





parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 2:17:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Titanwarrior89

1. I am old....er.
2. I drink alot of coffee
3. I like to sit now, when doing number 2 above.
4. I would want free games[:)]
5. I may show up late now, well probley most of the time.[:(]
6. Open Cell phone use....
7. And sleep at my desk.....big desk
8. A desk bigger than Erik's
9. Believe everything on my resume.
10.Last but not least, never ever stress me out and must be home to watch the Big Bang Theory.[:o]


Ahh, a nice break from teaching "those I can't mention" about life.

1. I only communicate via email. I hate face to face interaction. IM requires too much quick thinking too.

2. Self-starters are over rated. I need very detailed instructions.

3. I believe in individualism, meaning I am NOT a team player...leave me the hell alone.

4. If you expect me to work a full eight hours, then you have huge problems. No one "works" 8 hours.

5. I don't think this would be a problem at Matrix, but...women should be in the kitchen or mixing me drinks all day, like in Mad Men.

6. I don't like-anyone.




rogo727 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 2:35:13 AM)

I trump you all.
1. I'm from Iowa ...nuff said.




Titanwarrior89 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 3:32:53 AM)

Parusski, I like your Number 3.[&o]
quote:

ORIGINAL: parusski


Ahh, a nice break from teaching "those I can't mention" about life.

1. I only communicate via email. I hate face to face interaction. IM requires too much quick thinking too.

2. Self-starters are over rated. I need very detailed instructions.

3. I believe in individualism, meaning I am NOT a team player...leave me the hell alone.

4. If you expect me to work a full eight hours, then you have huge problems. No one "works" 8 hours.

5. I don't think this would be a problem at Matrix, but...women should be in the kitchen or mixing me drinks all day, like in Mad Men.

6. I don't like-anyone.





Anguille -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 8:33:18 AM)

I would just spend my time playing the games instead of working....




ilovestrategy -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 1:17:22 PM)

I would mess around with people's avatars. For example, I would replace Steiner's avatar with a pic of that officer that was after the Iron Cross. [:D]




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 2:11:30 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ilovestrategy

I would mess around with people's avatars. For example, I would replace Steiner's avatar with a pic of that officer that was after the Iron Cross. [:D]


That is truly evil ilovestrategybutcantfigureitout.

quote:

rogo727 truthfully said

1. I'm from Iowa


How horrible.


quote:

titanwarrior89 mumbled:

Parusski, I like your Number 3


And it applies to how I feel about you too.[:@]

Now, EVERYONE back to work. I am busy playing.




Rtwfreak -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 10:33:58 PM)

Because I would reduce prices to bargain bin prices after the first year. [:D]




Lützow -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/25/2013 11:09:51 PM)

1. Matrix is utilizing MS technologies and I refuse to work with anything not based on UNIX.
2. They couldn't convince 2by3 to introduce a WITP-style air-combat in WitE. [sm=00000459.gif]




H Gilmer -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 7:56:06 AM)

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 2:38:48 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


OOOHHHH, sorry H Gilmer-girl, but the Tide remark disqualifies you - for every thing. We Volunteer loyalists simply HATE you people!!!![sm=00000028.gif][sm=00000018.gif][sm=fighting0043.gif]

Other than having a mental handicap caused by the ugly color crimson, it sounds as though you have a great life.




Titanwarrior89 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 3:55:33 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


[:D]




TonyE -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 5:48:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rogo727
I trump you all.
1. I'm from Iowa ...nuff said.


[:D]




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 7:14:50 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Titanwarrior89


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


[:D]


I hope your little smiley face has nothing to do with that disgusting crimson tide.[;)]




Southern_land -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 11:09:22 PM)

1. i've seen their office, there is absolutely nowhere safe to string up my hammock

2. My main goal at work is to turn a gallon of coffee into a gallon of pee by knock off time*

3. I want a PC and a Mac

4. my secondary goal would be to restructure all hex based current games to random shape based games

5. Sexual inequality in the workplace, if i ain't getting none then no one should be

6. *Knock off time would be flexible in my favour, conceivably finishing work for the day might even precede starting work for the day**

7. **Start time would require a optimum flexability descretionary clause (see reason 6)

8. I believe i am less of a team player than parusski, and would go to extreme (some may say psychotic) measures to prove it

9. five days and 40 hours? Oh dear don't be silly!




Titanwarrior89 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 11:14:00 PM)

You get the Rope and I'll get the Stool, then we flip and sees who kicks it.[:)]
quote:

ORIGINAL: parusski


quote:

ORIGINAL: Titanwarrior89


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


[:D]


I hope your little smiley face has nothing to do with that disgusting crimson tide.[;)]





Titanwarrior89 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/26/2013 11:18:16 PM)

No Hammock! I am out. They'll have to find someone else. Oh yea I hate to Multi-task for someone else. But I am good at Multi-tasking, I can fish and eat hot dogs at the same time.[&o] But pick up a phone and sharpen a pencil......no can't and won't do it. Their lucky if they get me.[:D]




ilovestrategy -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/27/2013 12:27:59 AM)

I would use gold plated CDs for games and never charge for shipping.




H Gilmer -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/27/2013 4:08:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: parusski


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


OOOHHHH, sorry H Gilmer-girl, but the Tide remark disqualifies you - for every thing. We Volunteer loyalists simply HATE you people!!!![sm=00000028.gif][sm=00000018.gif][sm=fighting0043.gif]

Other than having a mental handicap caused by the ugly color crimson, it sounds as though you have a great life.



Orange: The color you take when Red is already taken. How's the Great Pumpkin, eh eh eh?




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/27/2013 4:13:15 PM)

quote:

4. my secondary goal would be to restructure all hex based current games to random shape based games


I like all your reasons, but number 4 is really brilliant.[:D]




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/27/2013 4:14:42 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer


quote:

ORIGINAL: parusski


quote:

ORIGINAL: H Gilmer

Reposted from a fellow Crimson Tider....

I drink beer and eat sausages. I sell smart-ass comments on the commodities market and I train my dog to do stupid tricks. I climb ladders and replace light bulbs, I drive to the grocery store when necessary. I float in the tub. When I'm feeling saucy I smoke a cee-gar. I run like the wind and can sing the Alan O'Day hit "Undercover Angel" without snickering.

I sell subscriptions to obscure newsletters. I read Sun Tzu. I play darts with the less gifted. I go to malls and look menacing. I taunt the overweight and then run away.

I stomp grapes. I dance like Nietzsche and live like Thoreau. I wobble but I don't fall down.

I pontificate. I cat-call and heckle. I smoke turkeys. I don't eat the pasta-salad.

I make paper airplanes during meetings. I enter contests where the first prize is a go-cart and can't sleep when the drawing date is near.

I shop and save. I fight my urges and lose on purpose. I watch "Gilligans Island" and dig Ginger. I watch "I Dream of Jeannie" and wonder how long I'd put up with Air-Force crap with that little magical snuggle bunny at home in her jammies.

I found Waldo. I dress accordingly. I sit still during church. I giggle when teachers say "asphalt" or "Uranus".

But most of all.... I love the Tide!

Do I qualify?


OOOHHHH, sorry H Gilmer-girl, but the Tide remark disqualifies you - for every thing. We Volunteer loyalists simply HATE you people!!!![sm=00000028.gif][sm=00000018.gif][sm=fighting0043.gif]

Other than having a mental handicap caused by the ugly color crimson, it sounds as though you have a great life.



Orange: The color you take when Red is already taken. How's the Great Pumpkin, eh eh eh?


Red is the color people show when it is discovered they attended Alabama.

TitanW, I have rope.




Rtwfreak -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/28/2013 5:46:08 AM)

I would actually make printed manuals for "all" games and not charge extra for them. [:D]




DivePac88 -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/28/2013 8:50:16 AM)

1/ Because I'm an Emu from New Zealand. [sm=scared0008.gif]

2/ Also because I wear an Indian braided leather/copper/bead bracelet. [;)]

3/ But mainly because I do really strange things to bread. [X(]

4/ And finally because I [replacement word] swear. [:'(]




Anguille -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/28/2013 9:31:27 AM)

Because i would be working on a game that would please only me....




SLAAKMAN -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/29/2013 1:25:10 AM)

quote:

1. I am old....er.
2. I drink alot of coffee
3. I like to sit now, when doing number 2 above.
4. I would want free games
5. I may show up late now, well probley most of the time.
6. Open Cell phone use....
7. And sleep at my desk.....big desk
8. A desk bigger than Erik's
9. Believe everything on my resume.
10.Last but not least, never ever stress me out and must be home to watch the Big Bang Theory.

I just took a second look at that list Tian. Thats some pretty darn good Slaakery youve got going on there I must admit. Id maybe split a hair or two on it but its still rather glorious indeed. For that I award you the video of the day; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BFxjDryrBE




parusski -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/29/2013 1:28:54 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Anguille

Because i would be working on a game that would please only me....


You just won 1st place for best post. We will be sending you 33 pounds of Brazilian Peanut Brittle.




Anguille -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/29/2013 9:31:21 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: parusski


quote:

ORIGINAL: Anguille

Because i would be working on a game that would please only me....


You just won 1st place for best post. We will be sending you 33 pounds of Brazilian Peanut Brittle.


ehm...thank you...?




Josh -> RE: Fun thread.....why Matrix Shouldn't Hire YOu! (1/29/2013 2:33:02 PM)

You folks can't hire me because I'm wearing these;

[img]http://static.nationalgeographic.nl/pictures/genjUserPhotoPicture/mediaBig/07/81/37/klompen-4-378107.jpg[/img]

No honestly.




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