A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

[anarchyintheuk]

I like Fukumi's ambition. He has 41 tons of supply, but he wants 43.

[Chickenboy]

Name misperred. Shourd be Fukmi - no 'u'.

[BBfanboy]

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Name misperred. Shourd be Fukmi - no 'u'.

BBfanboy have simirar thought - but parse it out with second 'u' moved to front of name. Mrs. MacGiricuddy use viorent version of action verb in name ...

[Cap Mandrake]

***********Seaside Virra, Truk Ragoon*********

Mandarake-san: Bettah carr M&M Consurting again. Mandarake-san swear system decide which daitais accept Nick fightahs made up by committee of B-Ark idiots.

[Cap Mandrake]

]**********08:15, Jury 2, 1942(d), Cairns Post Office, requisitioned as HQ for 2nd Port Support Group, Imperiarh Japan-mens Army*****

Lt. Cdr. Fukumi: Mrs. McGuiricuty, prease to not-ah be angary. Fukumi-san have to be strong because bushido and arso Cdr. Watanabe serious hard ass.

Mrs. McGuiricuty F*** you, Fukumi.

Lt. Cdr. Fukumi: No, seriousry, Think about it. What if Japan-mens come back? Mrs.McGuiricuty not-ah want get in trouburh.

Mrs. McGuiricuty They are not coming back, Fukumi. There are 25 thousand Allied troops 15 miles south of here. Not so tough now, are you, you hairy little bastard.

Lt. Cdr. Fukumi: <Retired Rev. Throckmorton emerges from his house with a tire iron> Hory crap! Rook, everyone, Fukumi-san have 41 tons of suppries. Rets make a dearh.

[MakeeLearn]

Fukumi

[MakeeLearn]

...

[Cap Mandrake]

[:D]

[Cap Mandrake]

Seems kinda young for a Lt. Cmdr. Battlefield promotion perhaps.

[Cap Mandrake]

*******Daihatsu barge No. 117, Cooktown*******

Cmdr Watanabe: <wading ashore> Hey, anyone see idiot Fukumi?

[Cap Mandrake]

*********Nightime, 11 m NW Cairns*********

<frightened young man with orientarh features crouch in bush>

Voice of Mrs McGuirity in distance: You can hide if you think if it will do you any good Fukumi but we are going to send in the dingos.

Rt. Commandah Fukumi (no shirt-ah): Dingos?

[Cap Mandrake]

***********Jury 2 and 3 1942(d)***********

Oz: Redeproyment for Summer vacation go pretty werr. Arried-dog tanks catch up with Japan-mens Navarh Guard unit that-ah was covering road West of Cairns and now
warking to Normantown for ride out. Nobody ansah radio any more. Probabry wah crime.

2300 troops stirr at Cooktown. One AK with men of 4th Div take one up the chuff from sub so 800 men aboard have to crimb off at Cooktown and get new boat. Today, Americ-mens capture Cairns so send in BB's tonight to brow prace up. One Japan-mens officah without shirt get reft behind in Cairns but now gone. Probabry wah crime.

Dive bombahs not aburh to reach Cooktown from Faurty Towahs so Arried-mens send in B-26...haha.

Afternoon Air attack on 32nd JAAF AF Coy , at 92,137 (Cooktown)

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 15 NM, estimated altitude 8,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 4 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 24

Allied aircraft
B-26 Marauder x 9

Japanese aircraft losses
A6M2 Zero: 1 destroyed

Allied aircraft losses
B-26 Marauder: 5 destroyed, 2 damaged

Aircraft Attacking:
3 x B-26 Marauder bombing from 7000 feet
Ground Attack: 6 x 500 lb GP Bomb

[Cap Mandrake]

Haro..come in 42nd Navarh Guard! What-ah hahppen you guys?

Ground combat at 87,141 (near Normanton)

Allied Deliberate attack

Attacking force 2285 troops, 17 guns, 229 vehicles, Assault Value = 255

Defending force 498 troops, 2 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 1

Allied adjusted assault: 130

Japanese adjusted defense: 1

Allied assault odds: 130 to 1

Combat modifiers
Defender: leaders(-), disruption(-), experience(-), supply(-)
Attacker:

Japanese ground losses:
507 casualties reported
Squads: 15 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 36 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 2 (2 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Units destroyed 1

Assaulting units:
254th Armoured Brigade
255th Armoured Brigade

Defending units:
42nd Naval Guard Unit

[Cap Mandrake]

Ceyron: Everyone on Arried side on Ceyron give up. Now vorunteer to work on
rairroad in Burma or garden at Kandy

[Cap Mandrake]

[font="Courier New"]
Dear Mistah Tojo-san;

Here what-ah hahppen with economy.

--Suppries go up on Home Isrands aftah Hata-san turn off production of Kate and Var and turn off expansion of Betty prants

--Turn back on production of Heren and Sarry

--Ordah repair two Tojo prants because not-ah have much inventory and need something reprace crappy Oscar

--Turn off Zero production at Harbin because not-ah need more Zero right now

--Everyone have enough suppry and fuerh and oirh in Home Isrands and refineries

--Negotiate with Mistah Terrer to buird nucrear device. Apparentarry nobody in America-mens program risten to guy. Smahtah than crap but hard to understand. Hata-san hire geisha girhs trim nose hairs Mistah Terrer. This-ah main serring point. Hata-san nevah see human being with so many nose hairs othah than Ainu.


Sincerery;

Hata-san

[/font]

[MakeeLearn]

"Here what-ah hahppen with economy"

Would be easier to "radiate a lizard" to fight for Empire, than to build atomic bomb.

[Cap Mandrake]

**********Seaside Virra**********

Mandarake-san: How tarr this thing?

Young man in fine linen slacks: 40, perhaps 50 meters Admiral.

Mandarake-san: 50 metahs? Hory crap! That-ah pretty
damn big. How give ordahs to weapon?

Young man in fine linen slacks: Right, current evidence suggests the capacity for obedience training is low. Secret Weapons Division
strongly suggests that the creature be delivered onto an enemy land mass.

Mandarake-san: This-ah thing not-ah aburh to swim then?

Young man in fine linen slacks: No sir, we estimate a capacity for rudimentary wading.

Mandarake-san: Wading?...Oh, rike warking around in watah?

Young man in fine linen slacks: Yes sir. We envision usage on the Australian continent but we recommend a....um..I believe the word is redeployment from Darwin.

Mandarake-san: Darwin? That-ah supposed to be a secret.

Young man in fine linen slacks: Well sir, all the mail has been returned from Darwin for 4 months. We figured something was up.

[Cap Mandrake]

Wah srow down because Arried-mens commandahs have to go to birthday party King or something.

**********Happy Birthday You Animals....Jury 4, 1942(e)*************

Arried-mens boats sneak up because Cooktown onry revah one AF and Junyo take torpedo up chuff. Port Moresby have 3 Daitai Betty and 1 of Nerrs, prus air HQ and fightahs. That-ah make northern Corarh Sea pretty dangerous for Arried-mens boats. Arso dangerous for Japan-mens transports.

ASW attack near Palm Island at 93,143

Japanese Ships
SS I-22

Allied Ships
DD Dewey
DD Blue
DE Starling

[Cap Mandrake]

Nice interrigence on Arried-mens at Cairns. Arso, brow some up.

Night Naval bombardment of Cairns at 92,140

Japanese Ships
BB Yamato
BB Hiei
DD Natsushio
DD Kagero
DD Makigumo

Allied ground losses:
365 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 13 disabled
Non Combat: 6 destroyed, 39 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled
Guns lost 9 (2 destroyed, 7 disabled)
Vehicles lost 14 (4 destroyed, 10 disabled)

BB Yamato firing at 1st Australian Division
F1M2 Pete acting as spotter for BB Hiei
BB Hiei firing at 11th Indian Division
DD Natsushio firing at 18th British Division
DD Kagero firing at 18th British Division
DD Makigumo firing at 1st Australian Division

[Cap Mandrake]

Night Naval bombardment of Cairns at 92,140

Japanese Ships
BB Hyuga
BB Yamashiro
BB Mutsu
BB Nagato
DD Kuretake
DD Wakatake
DD Hokaze
DD Asanagi
DD Shiranui

Allied ground losses:
403 casualties reported
Squads: 5 destroyed, 10 disabled
Non Combat: 29 destroyed, 59 disabled
Engineers: 1 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 48 (8 destroyed, 40 disabled)
Vehicles lost 39 (23 destroyed, 16 disabled)

Airbase hits 9
Airbase supply hits 4
Runway hits 22
Port hits 6
Port supply hits 5

BB Hyuga firing at Cairns
BB Yamashiro firing at Cairns
F1M2 Pete acting as spotter for BB Mutsu
BB Mutsu firing at 18th British Division
BB Nagato firing at 11th Indian Division
DD Kuretake firing at 5th Australian Division
DD Wakatake firing at Cairns
DD Hokaze firing at 11th Indian Division
DD Asanagi firing at 2nd Australian Division
DD Shiranui firing at 18th British Division