Priorities

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MrsWargamer
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Priorities

Post by MrsWargamer »

Just wondering.

If you had to choose between an awesome spouse (by that I mean a great person, I'm not talking dumb cosmetic appearances), or all your hobby stuff (hobby stuff = not required to maintain your life of course), what would you pick?

I have probably more thousands of dollars in wargames than I want to think about.
I have even more thousands of dollars in other hobbies than I do in wargames.
Books are educational, so I think we can leave them alone.

I'd box them up and give them away in a heart beat for a good man.
No I wouldn't be thinking, 'that's unfair, unreasonable, too demanding' and I know some will respond like that.

The question is simple, what would you pick, being alone with your stuff, and for laughs, I will even make it a complete Matrix Games/Slitherine catalogue just to be nasty :), or being alone with a great spouse.

My hobbies are not making me feel great as I try to get to sleep at night alone.
Wargame, 05% of the time.
Play with Barbies 05% of the time.
Play with Legos 10% of the time.
Build models 20% of the time
Shopping 60% of the time.
Exlains why I buy em more than I play em.
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terje439
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RE: Priorities

Post by terje439 »

ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

Books are educational, so I think we can leave them alone.

I'm good then [:D]
If for the sake of this thread, said spouse would have as messed up a daily rythm as me, then the spouse, if she was to sleep during night and be awake in the daytime, then I'll keep my stuff as we would hardly ever see eachother anyway.
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MrsWargamer
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RE: Priorities

Post by MrsWargamer »

Now, no cheating, you have to pick :)
Wargame, 05% of the time.
Play with Barbies 05% of the time.
Play with Legos 10% of the time.
Build models 20% of the time
Shopping 60% of the time.
Exlains why I buy em more than I play em.
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Zap
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RE: Priorities

Post by Zap »

Well, I do have an awesome wife for 19 years. I've never had to make that choice so your question(for myself) is an impossibility.
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MrsWargamer
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RE: Priorities

Post by MrsWargamer »

Not impossible, you basically have made it, you just didn't understand the question.

Would you pick her, or your hobby stuff. I am guessing that is a defacto 'her' response.
Wargame, 05% of the time.
Play with Barbies 05% of the time.
Play with Legos 10% of the time.
Build models 20% of the time
Shopping 60% of the time.
Exlains why I buy em more than I play em.
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KG Erwin
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RE: Priorities

Post by KG Erwin »

Why would you even ask this question? There is no either/or response to it. If you have a decent spouse who understands that you have peculiar hobbies, then it is immaterial. I'm a musician, and I've never been asked by a spouse to give it up just for her. I DID voluntarily quit playing when my daughter was born, but that was my own decision. That was 18 years ago, but since then they have abandoned me and moved away.

Now that I'm alone again, I can do whatever I want whenever I want. At this point, I'm happy with my hobbies, but I have mixed feelings about it. My house is my man cave, and I can live independently. Once in a while, though, I get a bit lonely. Living alone does have a downside to it.

With all that being said, I would definitely get back into another relationship, as long as she tolerated my hobbies.
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Aurelian
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RE: Priorities

Post by Aurelian »

ORIGINAL: KG Erwin

Why would you even ask this question? There is no either/or response to it. If you have a decent spouse who understands that you have peculiar hobbies, then it is immaterial. I'm a musician, and I've never been asked by a spouse to give it up just for her. I DID voluntarily quit playing when my daughter was born, but that was my own decision. That was 18 years ago, but since then they have abandoned me and moved away.

Now that I'm alone again, I can do whatever I want whenever I want. At this point, I'm happy with my hobbies, but I have mixed feelings about it. My house is my man cave, and I can live independently. Once in a while, though, I get a bit lonely. Living alone does have a downside to it.

With all that being said, I would definitely get back into another relationship, as long as she tolerated my hobbies.

Well put.
Watched a documentary on beavers. Best dam documentary I've ever seen.
Kuokkanen
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RE: Priorities

Post by Kuokkanen »

ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

My hobbies are not making me feel great as I try to get to sleep at night alone.
Agreed. But I gotta admit, I'm likely not the great spouse you're looking for... [8|]


ORIGINAL: KG Erwin

With all that being said, I would definitely get back into another relationship, as long as she tolerated my hobbies.
Indeed. Great spouse isn't the one who would tell me to abandon my wargame collections (WH40k models and all)
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zakblood
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RE: Priorities

Post by zakblood »

my GF is fine, as she also has a crafting hobby, so i got here a 24x24 summer house for summer time and a room in side for winter, so i converted the old garage as well for a pc test and play room, so we are both happy, still spend a lot of time together, but both have our own hobbies and rooms as well[;)]
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Orm
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RE: Priorities

Post by Orm »

I do not know how I would respond since I have yet to be put into that situation. I hope that I would have the option to put the games in storage and eventually convince my family to play a game (not necessarily a wargame) once in a while.

I've had friends who gave their gaming up for their wife, or girlfriend, and they seem happy.
Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often students, for heaven's sake. - Terry Pratchett
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zakblood
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RE: Priorities

Post by zakblood »

i'd sell the pc's all 6 of them, tablets and laptops if she asked, and games, even the old spectrum collection stored in the loft, might think twice about the neo geo and other consoles and games, but in the end, they would all go if needed
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warspite1
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RE: Priorities

Post by warspite1 »

Mmmm..... Hobbies or Mrs Warspite?, Hobbies or Mrs Warspite? Yep - no choice really.

See ya luv, I'm off to play World In Flames. Make sure you're packed and out of the house by the time I return.

Now if it were Haley on the other hand....

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Now Maitland, now's your time!

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GaryChildress
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RE: Priorities

Post by GaryChildress »

I can live without women. A good engrossing hobby on the other hand...
Josh
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RE: Priorities

Post by Josh »

The awesome spouse. [:D]

Second would be the "dumb cosmetic appearance". Yup.

And thirdly uhm what was the question again? Oh right the hobbies. What hobbies?
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MrsWargamer
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RE: Priorities

Post by MrsWargamer »

See some of you seem to have a logic problem.

Glenn seems to understand the question, but can't seem to understand the nature of choices. He IS alone, if I read correctly, loves his hobbies, but doesn't appear to like being alone. Sooo the question Glenn, is, if you walked into a cafe, met Mrs perfect, and she asked you, would you pick her, or would you stay with the hobbies, what would you pick? If you pick hobbies, then, you are not as lonely as you tell yourself. If you pick her, then you dislike your loneliness more than you dislike getting rid of the hobbies.

I am just curious where people actually feel about the nature of the choice.

Josh seems to prefer the companion over the hobby. Warspite seems to prefer the hobby over the companion.

It's not a crime to prefer your hobby. I have two friends, they are both hard working men (which makes them nice sounding as mates), but they have no interest in putting the mate before their hobbies (which just means they are likely to remain single). They are great guys, and are there for their friends when they are needed (they are the type that actually show up if you are moving, to help with the lifting).

Zak sounds like a decided choice, but Orm has never been put on the spot, so he is not really sure (which is ok).

I hear guys routinely lament about spouses complaining about their game playing. I would not be one of them. If your man isn't at home in front of his computer playing some game, then, is he out with another woman? Smart women like to know where their man is :)

Everyone has needs. I have an awesome collection, but, my real need is to hear good morning dear, and good night dear. I need to have someone to please, and it would be nice if I had someone to please me. My main place of amusement is my kitchen actually. But the dishes do get done, and then what? I like ceramics, but, if you do it long enough, you end up buried under a sea of the stuff. My mother had that trouble :) I am feeling a bit buried under some of my hobbies now actually. But, you can always make an apple crisp eh. It doesn't stick around. I like doing housework enough. It keeps me occupied.

My perfect day involves good morning dear, make you smile, make you breakfast, see you off to work, occupy my day, keep the place in order, go shopping (for amusement if I don't need anything currently), make dinner, greet you from work, maybe spend time at a movie (but that might only be good once a month eh, movies have to be worth going to), maybe go out to dinner, which is usually too expensive, but it gives you a reason to own nice clothes, generally, if you come home from work, and want to play on your computer, no problem for me, you work all day, you deserve your play time (I just hope sometimes play time means me :) ).

I don't understand demanding people though.

It's not like I am asking you to choose, your daughter or your son. That is a non question. It's not like I am asking you to pick your spouse or your friends, that is another non question. A spouse that makes you pick them over friends, is a dumb spouse. They are just asking to be dumped. The correct choice there, is you pick your friends. I have seen what happens to people that pick the possessive spouse. Their life is miserable.

Some people WANT to be alone. I am not one of those people :)
Just curious who here is happy to be single, and who is not interested in being single.
I'm also looking for a nice guy, in about the area of 50ish years I'd prefer 55+, you'd need to convince me for anything lower than 50. And below 40 is too much like craddle robbing :)
Hey, I don't need to JUST look on dating sites :)
Wargame, 05% of the time.
Play with Barbies 05% of the time.
Play with Legos 10% of the time.
Build models 20% of the time
Shopping 60% of the time.
Exlains why I buy em more than I play em.
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warspite1
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RE: Priorities

Post by warspite1 »

ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

1.
See some of you seem to have a logic problem

2.
if you walked into a cafe, met Mrs perfect, and she asked you, would you pick her, or would you stay with the hobbies, what would you pick?

3.
Warspite seems to prefer the hobby over the companion.

4.
I am just curious where people actually feel about the nature of the choice

warspite1

Quote 1 - Mrs Wargamer I don't want anymore unpleasantness with you - we had enough of that at Christmas. But friendly (well intentioned) advice - there are ways of interacting with people. You do tend to use language that is designed to wind people up.

Quote 2 - Surely if you meet Mr/Miss Perfect then he/she wouldn't ask you to give up your passion? Sure, if hobby time (whether that's wargames, golf, football, pub or whatever) is taking up too much time and eating into family / the relationship then by all means I would expect a spouse to ask for moderation. But to give up something one loves completely? No that is totally unreasonable, that's not love and certainly would not make the asker the perfect spouse.

Quote 3 - Not sure how you worked that out - my response was entirely in jest - I thought that was obvious (my fault perhaps for not adding smileys).

So being serious for a minute, no, I do not prefer my hobbies to my companion. They are both important parts of my life - and if I'm brutally honest, both come second to my little warspites.
I am aware that I have a huge love (obsession?) with military history and I also love games - put the two together and voila, that is why I am here. I also love watching sport. Mrs Warspite indulges me in those passions. If she loves me why would she not? To issue an ultimatum to someone to give up completely what they love doing and what gives them so much pleasure would be simply cruel - and not the actions of a perfect partner.

Quote 4 - BUT (for the sake of the question) IF Mrs Warspite did have a complete change of heart and said one day - right, its me or the games then that would be interesting. The games would have to go (into storage - I would not get rid of them) and I would keep things together for the children. As soon as the children were old enough (no idea what age that would be, but certainly post school and maybe university) that would be the end of that. The reason is as above, if she were to issue such an ultimatum (remember we are not talking about moderating, we are talking about an ultimatum to totally stop indulging a hobby) she can no longer care for my feelings - and that is not love.
Now Maitland, now's your time!

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TulliusDetritus
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RE: Priorities

Post by TulliusDetritus »

ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

Just wondering.

If you had to choose between an awesome spouse (by that I mean a great person, I'm not talking dumb cosmetic appearances), or all your hobby stuff (hobby stuff = not required to maintain your life of course), what would you pick?

I have probably more thousands of dollars in wargames than I want to think about.
I have even more thousands of dollars in other hobbies than I do in wargames.
Books are educational, so I think we can leave them alone.

I'd box them up and give them away in a heart beat for a good man.
No I wouldn't be thinking, 'that's unfair, unreasonable, too demanding' and I know some will respond like that.

The question is simple, what would you pick, being alone with your stuff, and for laughs, I will even make it a complete Matrix Games/Slitherine catalogue just to be nasty :), or being alone with a great spouse.

My hobbies are not making me feel great as I try to get to sleep at night alone.

Are they mutually exclusive (spouse or hobbies)? If hobbies = games, well, I guess a spouse.

If hobbies = your style of life (games, getting drunk sometimes, friends, trips, "I wanna do this, and I wanna do it now, and I don't have to ask anyone" etc etc etc) then the thing is more balanced and I don't know what I would be choosing [:D]
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MrsWargamer
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RE: Priorities

Post by MrsWargamer »

"Quote 1 - Mrs Wargamer I don't want anymore unpleasantness with you"

Then stop posting on my threads, you've made your point, and the point is you will never have any value in MY life.

I think you've played one too many anal retentive game designs. It's effecting you.
Wargame, 05% of the time.
Play with Barbies 05% of the time.
Play with Legos 10% of the time.
Build models 20% of the time
Shopping 60% of the time.
Exlains why I buy em more than I play em.
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warspite1
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RE: Priorities

Post by warspite1 »

ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

"Quote 1 - Mrs Wargamer I don't want anymore unpleasantness with you"

Then stop posting on my threads, you've made your point, and the point is you will never have any value in MY life.

I think you've played one too many anal retentive game designs. It's effecting you.
warspite1

Hahahahahahaha - calm down dear and take your meds. It was well meaning advice, but clearly you take everything the wrong way [:-]

And as you're still in stroppy mode - what does "effecting you" mean? [8|]

"anal retentive game designs" - any chance you could make sense when trying to have a go at someone?

I wasn't aware you owned the thread by the way - so if I fancy posting, then that's what I'll do.
Now Maitland, now's your time!

Duke of Wellington to 1st Guards Brigade - Waterloo 18 June 1815
Aurelian
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RE: Priorities

Post by Aurelian »

ORIGINAL: warspite1
ORIGINAL: MrsWargamer

"Quote 1 - Mrs Wargamer I don't want anymore unpleasantness with you"

Then stop posting on my threads, you've made your point, and the point is you will never have any value in MY life.

I think you've played one too many anal retentive game designs. It's effecting you.
warspite1

Hahahahahahaha - calm down dear and take your meds. It was well meaning advice, but clearly you take everything the wrong way [:-]

And as you're still in stroppy mode - what does "effecting you" mean? [8|]

"anal retentive game designs" - any chance you could make sense when trying to have a go at someone?

I wasn't aware you owned the thread by the way - so if I fancy posting, then that's what I'll do.

[&o]
Watched a documentary on beavers. Best dam documentary I've ever seen.
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