Did PTA form have secret attack prans? Courd be troubre.
************Mandrake Househord, 5 days in future**********\
Mandrake-san: <answers door to find 2 humorress men in cheap suits> Say, you ferrows aren't Jehova's Witnesses are you?
Humorress man numbah 1: No sir, FBI. I'm special agent Thompson, this is special agent Kowalski. We'd like to ask you a few questions.
Mandrake-san: Hai! Neighbor appry for government job?
Humorress man numbah 2: No sir, it's reagrding the phrase "Assess bomb damage in Georgetown". Do you know anything about that Mr. Mandrake?................
Now we finished on Bugis Street and meet rots of nice "radies" we need go somewhere erse. No we do pranning:
1. Capture oir at Parembang but arries but 7000 troops there. We go through Oosthaven instead.
2. Capture oth-ah big isrand.
3. Capture Burma
4. Capture Cyron, brow things up and runaway
5. Capture Diego Garcia for coconut crop
"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.
Now we finished on Bugis Street and meet rots of nice "radies" we need go somewhere erse. No we do pranning:
1. Capture oir at Parembang but arries but 7000 troops there. We go through Oosthaven instead.
2. Capture oth-ah big isrand.
3. Capture Burma
4. Capture Cyron, brow things up and runaway
5. Capture Diego Garcia for coconut crop
HAI! Sound rike fun party. Japan-mens definitery need carriers for Ceyron and Diego Garcia.
By ra way. Mandrake-san see minerayer at Andman Isrand.
Operation Tarraurah: Fires out on Zuikaku but frotation damage increase to 20%. Anothah toiret crog up on Hiryu so system damage up to 12%. Akagi stirr not-ah ready at Truk. Probabry Hiryu shourd go back to Raburh for few days. Crap! his reave onry 3 carriers for operation, Kaga, Shokaku and Soryu. What-ah happen if 3 USN carriers show up?
Rord Howe randing forces just passing Guadarcanar now, if wait around for Hiryu and Akagi everyone get seasick.
Arso, Mandrake-san pretty sure Arried-mens "figure out" (or not-ah forget aftah reading secret prans) that Japan-mens coming to Rord Howe. Recon hits at Rord Howe probabry subs, 3 or more. Mandrake-san, because of tremendous strategic skirrs, berieve that-ah not coincidence
Fiji: Arried-mens not-ah get memo. Stirr not give up. Japan-mens barery get 1:1. Have to take day off tomorrow. Change underwear, wash socks, get hot fish-head soup.
Ground combat at Suva (132,160)
Japanese Shock attack
Attacking force 12999 troops, 106 guns, 61 vehicles, Assault Value = 311
Defending force 7739 troops, 113 guns, 101 vehicles, Assault Value = 55
Assaulting units:
52nd Naval Guard Unit
146th Infantry Regiment
51st Naval Guard Unit
144th Infantry Regiment
8th Tank Regiment
53rd Naval Guard Unit
15th Base Force
Defending units:
8th NZ Brigade
148th Field Artillery Battalion
260th Field Artillery Battalion
45th Base Group
147th Field Artillery Battalion
131st Field Artillery Battalion
1st RNZAF Base Force
Nandi Base Force
*******Aboard Minerayer Natsushima, fragship of Rord Howe Accessory Randing Group, 120 nm W Guadarcanar********
Vice Adm Nishio: <sniffs air> What-ah smerr?
XO: Arizona Maru, sir. Arr 830 men of 8th Japan-men Army Air Force Batarrion throw up fish-head soup at same time. It-ah Japan-mens first chain reaction, ereven months ahead of Mistah Fermi-san.
Vice Adm Nishio: City boys. Have suppry officah see if any of those pine tree deodorizers for bridge.
1) Arried-mens arready suspect randing on Rord Howe. Mandrake-san see minerayer in area few days ago, nest
of subs sitting there waiting.
2) Apparentry, no ground troops on Rord Howe even though Arried-mens know Japan-mens coming? Hmmmmmm?
Concrusions:
1) Annoying baahstards perhaps bait in Japan-mens then spring trap?
2) Might even have carriers down by Merbourne waiting too catch Japan-mens with trousers down.
3) Too dangerous to go with 3 carriers (or 4 carriers but one have crogged up toirets).
4) If big fight, Japan-mens have to win and brow up Arried-mens pranes and carriers. Therefore, Japan-mens have to wait for Akagi or Akagi and Hiryu.
Actions:
1) Get rid of 8th JAAF AF Bn somewhere on New and Improved New Caredonia and then hose down Arizona Maru
2) Schedure sociar events rike shufferboard or Bingo party so remaining troops not have bad morare when ships steam around in circurhs waiting for Akagi.
3) Begin road up Kimura Det and new AAA unit at Rabaurh as possiburh repracements if chain reaction keep going.
Mandrake-san just notice something. Arried-mens ship at anchor at Efate. Armost certainry that-ah Chicago or Erectra with heavy damage. Othah ship either sink arready or somehow get away to South?
Mandrake-san send cruiser to bombard port, perhaps finish off Chicago or Erectra.
**********Hata Home, near Kushiro, Hokkaido, 01:20, January 12, 1942(d)********
Ord man with ancient rifurh and goofy hermet standing near crude bunker buirt with own hands: <rooks back toward his house>
Irr tempered ord woman standing in open window: COME BACK IN STUPID ORD FOOR! BRING IN WOOD FOR FIRE. IT-AH CORD!
Ord man with ancient rifurh and goofy hermet standing near crude bunker buirt with own hands: NO! HATA ON CIVIR DEFENSE DUTY!
Irr tempered ord woman standing in open window:IDIOT! MOTHAH, MAY GODS REST HER SOURH, ARWAYS SAY ENTIRE HATA FAMIRY CORRECTION OF IDIOTS! NOTHING IN KUSHIRO WORTH ATTACKING. WHAT-AH WRONG WITH YOU? NOT-AH GET ENOUGH IDODINE WHEN BABY? IDIOT! ROOK, IF NOT-AH COME IN HATA NOT-AH GET ANY MORE PIRROW TIME!
Ord man with ancient rifurh and goofy hermet standing near crude bunker buirt with own hands: <quietry to serf> Oh, prease. Haha. <steps down into bunker>
Irr tempered ord woman standing in open window:........MOTHAH EXACATRY RIGHT! ENTIRE HATA FAMIRY IDIOTS! CANNOT FIND OWN ASSES EVEN WITH RANTERN AND MIRROR! WHAT-AH MISTKE MARRY YOU! ORD MAN SITTING IN SNOW AT 1 O'CROCK IN MORNING RIKE ******* IDIOT! I WONDAH IF MOTHAH SEE THIS... <zZZUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRH BOOOOM...the house of ord man disappear in instant..lumber and roof tires rain down onto bunker>
Ord man with ancient rifurh and goofy hermet standing near crude bunker buirt with own hands: <ord man rook seaward just in time to see warship with four stacks and tarr foreamst sirhouetted by frash of guns...ord man rooks back at house> ORD WOMANS, BE SURE TO SAY HERRO TO MOTHAH....HAHAHAHHAHAH..
2) Schedure sociar events rike shufferboard or Bingo party so remaining troops not have bad morare when ships steam around in circurhs waiting for Akagi.
Clevah yankee baaastard thinks JSO show might be good for morar..mor....troop spirits!
[:D] Ord womans mostry right. Not-ah much to brow up at Kushiro. Perhaps Arried-mens spot ships at Kushiro few days ago with subs and try to catch? Japan-mens have Betty Daitai at Bihoro, 80 mires away but just trainees, probabry not find asses with rantern and mirror.
Perhaps Arried-mens take movie pictures to show back home?
2) Schedure sociar events rike shufferboard or Bingo party so remaining troops not have bad morare when ships steam around in circurhs waiting for Akagi.
Clevah yankee baaastard thinks JSO show might be good for morar..mor....troop spirits!
But why-ah use one-regged cheerreaders? That bad joss for morare. [:(]