Grandma knows.

Gamers can also use this forum to chat about any game related subject, news, rumours etc.

Moderator: maddog986

Post Reply
Aurelian
Posts: 4035
Joined: Mon Feb 26, 2007 2:08 pm

Grandma knows.

Post by Aurelian »

Lawyers should never ask a grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'

She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realise you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counsellors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
Watched a documentary on beavers. Best dam documentary I've ever seen.
User avatar
Lecivius
Posts: 4845
Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2007 12:53 am
Location: Denver

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by Lecivius »

Now THAT'S funny!!
If it ain't broke, don't fix it!
User avatar
Zap
Posts: 3628
Joined: Mon Dec 06, 2004 7:13 am
Location: LAS VEGAS TAKE A CHANCE

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by Zap »

Thanks for that I needed a good laugh today!
User avatar
jday305
Posts: 161
Joined: Sun Mar 31, 2013 10:43 am
Location: Northeast Indiana

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by jday305 »

After the day I have had that was the only thing that made me laugh today. Thanks.
RebelYell

"Those who don't know history are destined to repeat it."
“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”
Edmund Burke
User avatar
JEB Davis
Posts: 442
Joined: Tue Dec 27, 2005 9:24 pm
Location: Michigan, U.T.B.

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by JEB Davis »

[X(]

[:D]
Reduce SP:WaW slaughter, "Low Carnage":
Settings: 80Spot,80Hit,100R/R,XXXTQ,110TkT,150InfT,180AvSoft,130AvArm,150SOFire / Command & Ctrl ON / AutoRally OFF
Enhanced http://enhanced.freeforums.org
Depot https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/spwawdepot/
User avatar
warspite1
Posts: 41916
Joined: Sat Feb 02, 2008 1:06 pm
Location: England

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by warspite1 »

[:)]
Now Maitland, now's your time!

Duke of Wellington to 1st Guards Brigade - Waterloo 18 June 1815
User avatar
goodwoodrw
Posts: 2665
Joined: Mon Feb 14, 2005 12:19 pm

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by goodwoodrw »

So funny. but so so close to the truth, and the judges comment, using the the American Express's advertisement comment "priceless." [:D] [:D] [:D]
Formerly Goodwood

User avatar
Arjuna
Posts: 17768
Joined: Mon Mar 31, 2003 11:18 am
Location: Canberra, Australia
Contact:

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by Arjuna »

LOL[:D]
Dave "Arjuna" O'Connor
www.panthergames.com
User avatar
parusski
Posts: 4789
Joined: Mon May 08, 2000 8:00 am
Location: Jackson Tn
Contact:

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by parusski »

ORIGINAL: Lecivius

Now THAT'S funny!!

Oh hell yeah.
"I hate newspapermen. They come into camp and pick up their camp rumors and print them as facts. I regard them as spies, which, in truth, they are. If I killed them all there would be news from Hell before breakfast."- W.T. Sherman
User avatar
Greybriar
Posts: 1158
Joined: Fri Feb 09, 2007 6:54 am

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by Greybriar »

Nice one, Aurelian. Thanks for the laugh. [:D]
This war is not about slavery. --Robert E. Lee
Aurelian
Posts: 4035
Joined: Mon Feb 26, 2007 2:08 pm

RE: Grandma knows.

Post by Aurelian »

ORIGINAL: Greybriar

Nice one, Aurelian. Thanks for the laugh. [:D]

My pleasure. Laughing is so stress reducing.... :)
Watched a documentary on beavers. Best dam documentary I've ever seen.
Post Reply

Return to “General Discussion”